The Girls of Chibok, Nigeria: Never Forget

Remembering the girls of Chibok, Nigeria who, two years ago, were abducted by terrorists Boko Haram.  

Aisha, Dele Jegede

“Aisha is a haunting voyage, a kind of omen, a dark, brutal omen that leads without hesitation to the damaged psyche of Nigeria’s decaying collective humanity – the Chibok girls. Aisha exists fearfully in a range of bestialities. The bestialities of rape, slavery and misogyny wrought by fanatical men who descended upon whole schools of girls in Nigeria’s current history. jegede weaves the terror into a ruthlessly direct symphony of self-assessment that Nigeria badly needs.

There are no celestial possibilities in Aisha’s hollowed stare. Her demeanor is of foreboding intensity, her eyes a bewildered pair of deeply internalized terror. She gazes across and beyond the canvas, her broad forehead wrapped in red burqa as if hiding a bleeding hole at the centre of her cranium. Her mouth is clenched as if trapped in the middle of a prolonged hiss at an adult world that forsake her. In waves of green, white and of course red,

Aisha harbors a horror now squelched in the harrowed passage of her throat. In her dark visage, one could almost hear her terrorized scream from here to eternity. This is the one that haunts.” ~Excerpt from Prof. Segun Ojewuyi's essay on Dele Jegede's exhibition 'Transitions' at Terra Kulture, Lagos, Nigeria, starting January 10, 2016.

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Unseen Scars

Black person: This process, program, policy is racist.

White person: I'd like to think that what is happening and what they are doing is not intentional.

Translation: I am quite comfortable with the way things are. I'd like for you to believe and behave like it is unintentional too. The only change needed is your attitude adjustment.

Note: There is nothing sweet, cute, endearing, or lovable about racism, patriarchy, or any form of oppression.

Let me say that again: There is nothing sweet, cute, endearing, or lovable about racism, patriarchy, or any form of oppression.

The expectation that responses to any of the above should be "respectable," "politically correct," sweet, or palatable produces the unseen scars of emotional and psychological violence.

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To Be Human

Women are the bearers of culture. Patriarchy will be strangled when we refuse to perpetuate that shit. We are not the cause of it but can assume a major role in its demise.

No. I am no longer interested in patiently awaiting the end of patriarchy, racism, colorism, ageism, classism, divisiveness within and among "minority/ethic/tribal" groups. What it looks like to walk this gauntlet is what you perceive of my lived experience. Imagine being exposed to trauma from all of these domains. In which domains are you traumatized: none, fewer, more?

To find the beauty, locate peace, search for and find joy, give and experience love is what it is to be human.

Let's not traumatize each other in our quest to be.

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Speaking Truth in Our Communities

"If you are silent about your pain, they'll kill you and say you enjoyed it." ~Zora Neale Hurston

Silence has never unfucked anything! And is it a coincidence that those who prefer your silence are those who inflict your pain and/or, no matter how tangentially, benefit from it? It is no surprise that some of those benefiting from your torment also look like you (a verifiable fact as old as slavery and all other forms of injustice themselves) and join the chorus for your silence?

Make no mistake, speaking truth to power and speaking truth in our communities carry the same risks.

As if that is not enough ...

they have no problem muzzling our agony as we fight to breathe, all the while the squeal of their discomfort pierces the drum of even the deaf ear.

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International Women's Day

Yesterday, International Women's Day, I sat with how female bodies are claimed, controlled, and brutalized by those intent on subjecting them to servitude.

'A Girl in the River: The Price of Forgiveness' produced and directed by Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy speaks to the matrix of society, violence against women, forgiveness, and the absence of female agency. It points our attention toward the terror of surviving a murder attempt and the struggle of continuing to survive in one's community after that trauma.

This 2016 Oscar winner for Best Documentary Short tells the extraordinary story of a young Pakistani woman who narrowly escaped an "honor" killing by her father and uncle. Told through the lens of a true love story, the film is a scathing examination of the contradictions and gaslighting that is part of everyday life for women in Pakistani society.

Forgiveness as a tool of reconciliation and social cohesion, functions to isolate the survivor from her mate, family, and the broader community if she does not acquiesce. Under Pakistani law, the female victim's forgiveness relieves her assailant of all criminal wrongdoing and punishment. Imagine this added trauma to an experience of terror. Imagine.

'Saving Face,' another short by Obaid-Chinoy, brings into focus the horrific act of dousing women with acid, permanently disfiguring and killing some.

We need to do better. Humanity, we need to do better.

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